Why is ConAgra's Snack Called a Slim Jim?
THEY said that milk helps you to lose weight.
THEY said that cheese is the perfect diet food.
THEY said that ice cream prevents heart disease.
In my lectures, I've predicted that one day THEY
will claim that snacking helps you to lose weight.
Of course, I've selected the ultimate absurdity
to make some sort of point, but I no longer sure of
what point that is.
So, with the August 1, 2010 publication of an article
in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, Americans
will be taught that snacking helps overeaters avoid obesity.
Am J Clin Nutr 92: 428-435, 2010.
Vol. 92, No. 2, 428-435, August 2010
RESEARCHERS: Debra R Keast, Theresa A Nicklas, et. al.
"Snackers, compared with nonsnackers, were less likely to be
overweight or obese and less likely to have abdominal obesity."
I'm considering a Domino's pizza for dinner and Carvel Ice
Cream Cake for dessert. I need to lose a few pounds...
Before posting this column, I did a bit of research on the
lead author, Debra Keast.
Debra has received financing from snack-giant, ConAgra.
During the last fiscal quarter, ConAgra grossed over $2
billion in sales earning a $330 million profit, a good
portion of their business comes from...you guessed it. Snacks!
Look up the word "snack" in your dictionary and you will
see ConAgra's corporate logo. (Syrup dripping from an
ear of corn and a tombstone.)
Got French Fries? The majority of America's fast food restaurants
purchase frozen fries from ConAgra, the same company which
manufactures such diet food snacks as Reddi-Whip, Orville's
Reddenbacher's Popcorn, Snack Packs, Chef Boyardee's canned
ravioli snacks, and Slim Jims.
Oh, what the heck. I went for broke on this one and spent a few
hours investigating Debra's co-author and colleague, Dr. Theresa
A. Nicklas. You could not invent better fiction than these facts:
Dr. Nicklas performs research funded by the Sugar Association.
Dr. Nicklas has worked for the Kellogg Company.
As for her position on sugar...
...Dr. Nicklas has testified before the Food and Drug Adninistration
and United States Department of Agriculture urging both agencies
to not list high fructose corn syrup or other refined sugars on
snack food labels.
Continue to believe studies published in the Journal of Tripe,
and one can only conclude that Slim Jim snacks keep consumers
So, Slim Jim, anyone? If you were to read a list of the ingredients,
you would add one letter and change another to make the new
name: Slime Jam!